Rain...Rain...Go Away!

Okay, so the weather was great in my last post.  In this post it has turned to days on end of rain.  I am finishing my last week of projects and I can officially say by two weeks from tomorrow I will be done with school!  I am so close to the end that I can taste it!  Yeah!   I had a break in my spirit last week.  It was all just too much.  I just felt like I could not move from one point to another without forgetting something.  Which is not too unusual but this jumping from insurance salesperson, to student, to child, to wife, to house cleaner, bill payer, grocery shopper was starting to take its toll. I told an old friend today that I see that God was holding out on giving us a baby until this point of school was over.  I am slowly shifting back into life and can't wait for summer!  Last weekend we celebrated my dad's birthday in French Lick.

 

The weather over the past weekend ended up with several trips to our basement because of storm warnings.  I made a quick trip down to see my parents and go to my childhood church for Easter.  There was a tornado in a small community that my family has a farm in.  It happens that my faux sister Jessica has a friend who lost his home in the tornado.  The couple are getting married in a month and lost alot of the belongings they were starting out with.  Below are some picks from my little trip home.  One trip took four different road to find one without water.  I sure am glad I live on a hill!

In regards to the monthly update on baby Hudson.  We had been looking into starting an international adoption along with our domestic.  However, it is not something we can do at the same time.  So we have chosen to stay where we are at.  We have an invested amount of time in the domestic program and just don't feel  we can start over right now.  There have been few babies placed in the state this year.  Silent prayers that this takes a turn.  No only for my family but the many others on this journey.  I get excited when I hear someone gets pregnant but it is super special when it one of those people you know had to wait so long for it or their adoption to process.  We just ask for prayers and I know it will all happen at a time that is just right for our family. 

"Life is all about timing...the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable...attainable.  Have the patience, wait it out.  It's all about the timing."

Spring Fever

The sun is shining and I so long to be outside instead of stuck at my computer doing school.  This must have been my frame of mind about an hour ago when I sat down to take a history test.  I guess the side of my binder hit my computer and submitted the test.  I had not answered one single question.  I am waiting on word to see if my teacher will reset it.  Oops! In one month this will all be over for the summer.

I have been doing a project for school and got to spend some much needed family time last week.  I had to interview my grandparents.  I take for granted how lucky I am to still have one set living.  It really was enjoyable interviewing them and hearing their stories.  They have lived through so much.  My grandfather was one of six children.  The kicker is both of his parents were deaf.  It was so moving to hear what they overcame as a family in a time when deaf people were looked at as ignorant.  I said as we were sitting at the table that strength must be something that runs in our veins.  It amazes me how so many people grow up or are in hopeless situations but prevail.

There is still no news on the adoption front.  We are exploring some other options but at this time want to keep those to ourselves.  I told Critt that I wished God would just send you notes every once in awhile.  They could say “Your doing the right thing…hang in there” or “Your taking taking the wrong path…this way.”  Doesn’t really work like that though.  You just have to keep the faith.

We have lots of fun activities planned in the next couple of months.  We are going to New York City, Las Vegas, I hope to make it to LA to see my aunt and the ocean.  So there is a lot to look forward to in the sunshine ahead!  Spring and Summer just seem to make the adoption road a little easier.  Maybe because we are able to get out and have fun. 

Speaking of faith and my grandparents.  My grandmother always said this too me when I was in a place of doubt or questioning decisions that I had made.  So she has repeated this quote often as I seem to hash out everything. So my quote for this post is:

“What is to be will be and what is not to be may still be too.”-Jennie Bennett

Ethiopia Adoptions

Blogging definitely needs to be on my list of not’s at the moment.  I have a mile long to do list for school and I have worked more this week.  So I am so behind on everything it seems.  Did I mention I was on Spring Break?  I forgot to because someone forgot to get the break memo around here.  Anyways, I stopped long enough to type this quick note.  I am getting ready to make a chart to count down the days of school I have left.  I am so ready for warm weather and summertime!

When I see these headlines it makes my heart stop a beat.  I think of so many more families that have already been on a long journey and these setbacks have to be incredibly tough.  It seems as we got stared in this process so many countries had limited, slowed, or closed their adoptions.  China has a wait list of years, Korea has been flooded with applications and waits extended, Vietnam closed, Guatemala closed, etc.  Ethiopia had been a light for so many and their wait times were not as long as so many.  If you read my last blog I mentioned two children from Ethiopia that had been adopted.  I hope that they make it to their new family before the below goes into effect.  My prayers also go out to all the families that are in the process.  May they have peace and hopefully this is resolved soon for the sake of the thousands of children there without homes.  I cannot imagine a year into this process being told our door had closed and we would have to start over somewhere or wait longer. 

Ethiopia moves to sharply reduce foreign adoptions

NEW YORK – Ethiopia, the No. 2 source of foreign children adopted by Americans, is making changes that could reduce the number of international adoptions by up to 90 percent.

The change, implemented Thursday, has dismayed U.S. adoption agencies and they have launched a petition drive urging Ethiopia to reconsider. The State Department warns that pending applications to adopt from Ethiopia could encounter "significant delays."

The new policy is intended to reduce cases of fraud and corruption. But it marks a dramatic turnaround for a country that — in the eyes of adoption advocates in the U.S. — had been a rare international bright spot in recent years.

According to State Department figures, 2,513 Ethiopian children were adopted by Americans in the 2010 fiscal year, second only to China as a source country.

For all of you that have children warm and safe in their beds tonight or if you just come across this blog please take a moment to sign the attached petition. 

http://betheanswerforchildren.wordpress.com/2011/03/08/emergency-campaign-for-ethiopia/

Talk to everyone soon!

J

Bad Blogger

I am not really on top of my “A” game when it comes to blogging.  I give kudos to those people who can do it all the time.  I am taking an English class right now called Advance Composition. I am writing my little heart out right now but just not on the public forum.  I had to write four short pieces for my final portfolio.  I had enough inspiration for three and got one off my blog as a get by piece since we were just picking one of the four to be our actual piece.  Guess what…my blog piece got picked.  So I have basically been writing and rewriting one of my pieces from here.  If it is good enough I get to submit it to be published some place.  Hooty who, huh?  It is also rather emotional to be turning in a short memoir on something so personal too.

In regards to adoption, I let myself have a moment last week.  I went out and looked at a list of waiting children.  I ran across a picture of a boy and girl in Africa.  They were 3 and 5 and both of their parents had died.  A lot of these kids are just found wondering the streets and sent to orphanages.  They had been picked to be adopted and that had fallen through.  I did something I had never done yet in this process and emailed about them to inquire.  At dinner that night, I told Critt I was thinking about us going to Ethiopia and getting these 2 kids.  I know in his mind he was thinking...man...I thought we were having chicken...now she wants to go get two children in Africa? That is why I love him. My voice of reason telling me we have to think about each situation that comes and if it is right for our family.  I got an email back and the kids had thankfully already been adopted.  I didn’t have to go to bed and worry about them alone and frightened in an orphanage around the world.  I did go upstairs, crawled in my bed, pulled the comforter over my head, and I bawled.  I cried till I shook.  I know this sounds awful but it felt so good.  I just needed to let it out. Sometimes that is what is best for your soul.  You can’t be a pillar of strength all the time.  Sometimes you just have to be human.

Today I was told a story about a person who was pregnant and emotional about telling another person who was having difficulty conceiving.  I thought about this and I thought I would share what I feel.  I know people have told me that they don’t know what to say to me before so I thought I might be able to lend inspiration to this one.  To begin, everyone is not the same on how they take things so I can’t be the voice of reason.  I can say that sometimes other people put more thought into this then the actual person suffering from infertility.  It is harder for me at times to just be treated differently or the attention just being drawn back to my situation.  I am as happy for someone who is pregnant as I was years ago.  I think what anyone outside this club can do is just help to make adoptive or infertile couples just feel normal.  There is so little normalcy in this journey.  I question this situation I am in a lot.  Sometimes I just have bigger fish to fry.  I weigh such life changing questions all the time.  Am I doing the right thing?  Am I adopting from the right place?  Should I still try to go the doctor and keep attempting for my own?  It is the right time? Did I wait too long? Do I need to do the doctor route before I finish school and go back to work? Where is the time going so fast? Why is time going so slow? Are we making the right decisions for us?  These decisions change the course of our life. I just long to ponder over trivial things-What type of baby food should my child eat? Where should I eat lunch? Did I pay our electric bill?  All in dear time…Jenny...all in dear time.

On that note, we have had two wonderful weekends at home.  The weather has been beautiful at times and it has been nice getting outdoors.  So to end this post, if you haven’t noticed I love quotes.  I don’t have time or patience to read inspirational books that often.  A great quote can really motivate a person.  The below was shared by the same person who shared the poem in my previous post.  Thank you!

“When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen:  There will be something solid to land on, or you will be taught to fly.”  ~ Barbara Winters